True Lies

Remember, and then, just forget it. Right?

What you should know about stalking your ex

ExStalking

The first thing you should know about ex-stalking is that it is a thing you simply do NOT do. ‘Oh, but we had a great time together, it’s worth stalking’ or ‘I have nothing to lose, so I’ll stalk them’. You have nothing to lose stalking your ex, the one person you loved the most on Earth… How about your dignity????

How about stalking a cat in the dark streets? Is that a good idea?

I admit I’ve been through both sides. I’ve stalked and I’ve been stalked, and neither of them I daresay I enjoyed having its experience. When I did the … you know, stalking thing I wanted  so much to get back that I did some irrational things that I am not really proud of. And when I was being stalked, I wanted so much to NOT get back together that the only thing I could feel was ‘alien shame’.

And some of you might be questioning what happened last night in the graduation prom… Yeah… Who was I yesterday? I was neither. I saw a friend of friend break down because of her ex boyfriend. Of course I was not a dear friend of hers, so all that came through my mind while we were yesterday chasing down in an impossible place some faceless guy I have never met. Just to exemplify, in that place, even with a cell phone, I could not easily find my closest friends! So figure out a drunk extremely beautiful chick wasting time trying to find a jerk in the middle of a gigantic place filled with thousands of unknown people. That is what I went through yesterday.

So please, if you want to stalk someone… The first thing you should know is how to NOT stalk that special person.

You may know that it is easier to not stalk as you grow older. It is the first sign that this kind of behaviour is not good, cause as you grow older you tend to behold more wisdom? Yeah, I like this theory. The second thing you should know that it does not depend on your gender! The stalking behaviour comes with personality… My third tip is: if you can’t handle not doing anything… Then use the opposite strategy: do it quick and extremely intense: it will make you feel nothing but shame, but unfortunately there are some people who must feel deep inside to stop doing it. And if nothing of this works out, my last tip is: go find a psychiatrist. Sorry. =X Just kidding, that was not my last tip… Before going to find a doc, try to manipulate the stalking energy: go stalk someone who is not an ex, it is likely that the new person finds it cute, all that intensity and the magic that may come from stalking. And then, if it does not help go to a doc. ;D

And, please do NOT stalk on Facebook or Twitter. Just read what would naturally come to you, never entering the person’s profile. Make it simple: those things people post mainly in Facebook are not… how can I say it… REAL. So, go get a life, and that means, if you are a natural stalker, make it real, get a real life stalking. I know stalking is easier on Facebook… But COME ON. You all know what I mean.

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This entry was posted on April 1, 2012 by in Life and tagged , , , .
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